Influenced, Inspired, and Empowered by Friends

This week several times I have been in conversations about friendship and how we are influenced, inspired and empowered by friends. The people we spend time with - especially those we share more than superficial life experiences with - can have a profound effect on our character and our outlook on life.

This week a friend I have known for most of my life is celebrating a landmark birthday. I have been reflecting on how he has influenced and inspired me through the years  to develop new interests ( or revive longstanding ones!) to learn new skills, and to become acquainted with a variety of people  who excel in these interests and/or skills. My life has been so much richer by his presence.

I can think of so many friends who have inspired (and continue to inspire) me to grow. Some of them have been in my life for many years, some of them have come into my life relatively recently. There are a select number of friends whom I  only see on Skype, Facebook, and/or their blogs. What all of my friends have in common are various qualities that I admire and aspire to develop in myself. They inspire me to continue to grow into the best possible version of myself. Every one of them has influenced me to keep my heart and mind open to possibilities and challenges.

My friends and I also empower each other. There is reciprocal give and take. One is not the "helper"and the other the "helped"nor the "advisor and the other the "advised". I was reminded yesterday of a friend who knows my ineptness with mechanical things. Very patiently she has shown me how some of my tools are best used and how to assemble them . I needed to use one yesterday and I was reminded of her patient instruction. Then I slowly ( with a couple of mistakes!) managed to assemble and use the tool all by myself. I also took it apart and stored it properly afterwards. I was proud of myself and I was appreciating my friend for empowering me.

It has taken me some time to be aware of the friendships I keep and the ones I let go. I am more aware of who I am becoming as a result of the company I keep. I truly appreciate the give and take of  inspiring friendships.

Have you reflected on the friends you choose to spend time with? How do they influence, inspire and empower you? How do you influence, inspire, and empower them to be the best version of themselves?
Please share your reflections on friends! I would love to read comments here on the blog or you can e-mail me at colleen412@gmail.com or pm me on Facebook. You might also enjoy my Pinterest boards https://www.pinterest.com/colleen2322/
Thank you for stopping by!

Cultivate Your Garden of Life and Happiness

Do you believe you are here on earth to be alive and happy? I do. If you don't maybe you will feel better if you go and read something else...
Still with me?
I cannot help comparing cultivating a garden to growing a happy life. I have been gardening  off and on most of my life. Here I am at age 4 weeding by my Grandma's back door- note the Mary Jane shoes (ever the Dressy Bessy I had to be dressed for the garden in those days- one of my paper dolls had a sun suit just like the one I am wearing- with the ruffles!). I am smiling happily while pulling the weeds.

One of my gardening friends commented that she has never seen a photo of me at any age barefoot. The reason dates from a year before the photo above. My Aunt Rose wanted me to experience the joy of walking barefoot on the grass. A lovely plan for a little girl who was growing up in apartments and hotels as she travelled with her parents. I joyfully took off my Mary Janes and my socks and took my first step on the clover studded lawn. I promptly stepped on a bee! That was the end of my barefoot days but not the end of my gardening adventures... Just recently I have been willing to try walking barefoot on a designated path in my Secret Garden. So far - even though beekeepers have been keeping bees for several years  on my property- I have not been stung. I have a feeling the bees know that I am the gardener who provides their feast and perhaps even that the beekeepers name the queens  after me!
So do I design my life and happiness  the way I design my garden -yes!  I understand that a garden requires quite a bit of maintenance and rebuilding. So does my life and happiness. I design my garden to be as pleasant to work in as I can manage. I am frequently discovering new tools and new methods to make my work more enjoyable and actually manageable. I have had to let go of many designs and plants that are just too labor intensive for me now.  The same is true for my life and happiness. I design my day - note - it is a design, a blueprint, not a rigorous routine- the way I design my garden.
The first principle for me is pleasure/happiness. If the garden / my life is not a pleasure/a source of happiness -why have it?  For me interleaving work with play/rest is key.
I begin most days  at 5:30 (sometimes even a bit earlier). The cats are my alarm clock. They want their breakfast and their lap time. They are not patient and their demands are quite vocal. I usually wake up well before they start in so that I can have a few minutes to appreciate being alive and awake for another day. I like to have a few minutes to wiggle my toes and fingers and wake up my body with some dance like motion. Once I am dressed, I feed the cats, unload the dishwasher and make my hot lemon water. I listen to music and dance around the kitchen as I do my early chores. Then I relax on the sofa in the den plugged into my Italian music/conversations with all 3 cats on my lap .
After awhile I get up, brew a cup of tea,and return to the sofa with the cats. By 7:00 I am ready to get myself and my tools together to work in the garden. Here is what I saw early one morning when I stopped to smell this fragrant lily on my way to the greenhouse:

 By some miracle the little frog was still there when I came back with my camera!

 If it is raining or too cold I do some housework or work on a sewing project. I work for 3 or 4 hours and then change clothes and have an enormous, healthy, late breakfast. It is my favorite meal of the day. I take it out to the Secret Garden on fair days and sit at the edge of the lily pool and watch the frogs and the dragonflies. When I come inside at about 11:30 I check for phone messages and I turn on my computer to check e-mail, work on courses I am taking etc. Yes, I have been up for 6 hours before I get into cyberspace. I work on the computer and/ or I do household chores until about 3:00 when I have a snack or lunch. Again, I take it out to the Secret Garden or if it is raining or too cold/too hot I sit in my glassed in garden room. From 3:30- 6:30 I play and exercise (another form of play for me). This includes chatting to my friends on the telephone or Skype, practicing piano/rollerskating/learning a new dance or exercise routine etc.  At 6:30 I turn off the computer and I feed the cats and tidy up the kitchen. Then I have  a bath, get into my pajamas, and until lights out I read or I listen to music while crocheting or knitting. Even though it looks like I have been playing/relaxing most of the day, I have actually accomplished quite a bit of work.
Not everyday is exactly the same- but this is the general blueprint. Weekends are more free form - and I do indulge in Pinterest and watch movies and catch up with Facebook friends on Saturdays and Sundays. Even when I had my first 9-5 job, the blueprint was similar. I have always liked to have quiet, alone time before school/work and I always preferred to have my main meal at breakfast or  lunch.  I have also always at least attempted to work in playtime between bouts of work! No homework for me immediately after school-I was on my roller skates or my bicycle for awhile first! I scheduled my classes at university  so that I had plenty of breaks and playtime. When I had a 9-5 job  I would ride my bicycle after work for an hour or so to divide my day from work to play.
Confession: when I had my own bookshop and later when I had my flower farm and garden design business I burned out! I did not follow my blueprint  and I suffered from migraines and generally poor health. It took me awhile both times to recover. Some of us are slow learners. It's never too late...
I am NOT recommending my blueprint! What I would like to inspire you to do is to create your own blueprint for a life that makes you happy!
 When are you energized?
When do you work most efficiently?
When do you need play/creativity time?
When are you really hungry and what time of day is best for your main meal (this is about how you FEEL- not social rules!)
What is the optimum time for you to sleep? To wake up?
These are just a few questions to get you started to cultivate your own garden of life and happiness.
No hard rules - just an optimal blueprint!
How do you prefer to schedule your time? Do you like to work straight through the day and then rest/play or do you like breaks in your routine?  I know many people who seem to feel best getting all the work done and then relaxing and having their main meal late in the day. It is all about what works for YOU!
Please leave me a comment or email me or pm me on Facebook. How do you cultivate your garden of life and happiness on a daily basis?
It's lily time!

Creative Energy Optimizer

One of the pillars of my plan to embody Ageless Beauty for the rest of my life is to be a Creative Energy Optimizer. I want to optimize my own creativity-of course- and I especially want to inspire others to not only appreciate beauty everyday but to begin to create beauty themselves.
This weekend I had a lovely Sunday afternoon playing with making fabric flower costume jewelry with my sister. We were chatting about how being  creative and playful makes us feel more energized. Too many chores ,work, basic cooking, laundry, housekeeping,etc. are exhausting.This week I want to inspire you to take some time out to be creative.
 What sparks creativity in you?  What did you like to do as a child? There are so many crafts, sewing, knitting, crocheting, painting, coloring some of the beautiful designs available now in books or online, drawing, baking, cooking something new- learning a new dance routine- learning a new piece of music- whatever is fun and perhaps just a bit challenging that will result in something that gives you pleasure and a sense of accomplishment. The operative words here are FUN and CREATIVE.  What would you like to create?
When I started making costume jewelry, I began with a book for children-Jazzy Jewelry- part of a series of craft books called Kids Can!.  I figured if an 8 year old could manage some of the projects, I surely could . Here are some of my projects

Here is the book and a page of instructions

Here is a close-up of what I made from those pages

I am a slow right brain learner- so seeing pictures and beginning with really simple directions helps me to develop skills - and makes the learning curve less steep! Ever since I was a tiny child I have loved dressing up in elegant clothes with unique or antique jewelry. Now after a few years practice I can make almost anything I want. And most important- I enjoy playing with the materials and I have fun!
There are so many really good instructions available now in books, on blogs, on Youtube for almost any project you would like to create! If you need to ease in to this suggestion - just begin by making a wish list of what you would like to try and/or what you loved to do as a child.
My sister and I were reminiscing about Sunday afternoons at our stepmother's house. Our stepmother was a very busy working mom, but at heart she was a creative genius. She had so many different materials available in cupboards and closets neatly packed in boxes. Anything we wanted to learn was possible! Over the years she taught us to cook, to sew, to make toys , to paint... so many things! Best of all she gave us the gift of knowing that we could learn how to do whatever we were inspired to do.
Here is the work in progress from Sunday afternoon- red petals ready now to be assembled and my first-not perfect!- finished flower barrette.

I would love to read your comments. What are you dreaming of creating? Something new in an art or  craft that you already know how to do - or  learn a new skill? Are you willing for your first efforts to perhaps be less than perfect? Please leave me a comment below or email me colleen412@gmail.com or send me a message on Facebook. You can also see my pins on Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/colleen2322/

Summer Mode

The full moon/summer solstice seems to be influencing me. I have begun to spend more time in my garden-not just actively gardening! I do love to work in my garden, but this week I have begun spending more time luxuriating in the beauty of it.  Unless it is raining, I enjoy my meals while  sitting on the edge of the waterlily pool. At some point in the day I have begun placing a lovely clean sheet on the grass in the sun and lying there listening to music or reading. Meanwhile I am being kissed by the sun , soaking up vitamin D. I am enjoying the fragrance of the grass and flowers. The wood thrushes are singing. There are so many butterflies, dragon flies, bees and hummingbirds flying around. I am inspired to spend more time outdoors and way less time on my computer!

A perfect place to dance in the moonlight! Or enjoy the sun by day.

Another fun aspect of summer is being in summer mode by dressing for the lovely sunny weather. A few weeks ago I read a  blog by Barbara Fisher about Vintage patterns :  http://marchhousebookscom.blogspot.co.uk/search?q=+vintage+patterns
I was so  thrilled to discover a kindred spirit who shares my love of vintage clothes. I was also moved to encourage her to sew the patterns and wear the clothes.  So this week, in light of the full moon/summer solstice, I am starting to take out and repair and wear some of my lovely vintage clothes. Today I am wearing my favorite hat. I bought it from Biba in my youth in the last century! Whenever I was in London I spent as much time and money as I could afford in at Biba. It was enchanting! Alas, it ended all too soon- I arrived at the end of the era! I  still have my hat and some jewellry... I have always loved antique and/or unique things, and I have always been a "Dressy Bessy". I also love the old fashioned look that Laura Ashley designed way back then. I haunted the antique and second hand shops to find just the things I wanted. I still do. I am so glad I learned to sew as a teen. I can make anything I want now- as long as I can find the fabrics.
This summer I encourage you to express yourself and indulge in what you really love! Especially if it makes you feel unique, beautiful, alive...!

  Maybe I am suffering from Summer Solstice/ Moon Madness????

Do you get energized by the summer solstice? Are you feeling in the mood to express yourself more? Is summer a time for you to be more playful and  be outside more of the time?
Please leave me a comment- I really appreciate them. Or email me or send a pm on Face Book. I love getting replies! Thank you for stopping by!

Summer is a coming in!

At long last we have sunshine and hot afternoons.  I was beginning to think I had no hope of my own organic Italian tomatoes and basil this year. My first crop of seedlings failed to thrive. The summer veggies are now finally planted. Some summer flowers are beginning to bloom. The creek view is now appropriately jungle like.

I knew summer would arrive sooner or later -  but this year I was beginning to be a bit impatient about the timing. It has been so cloudy and dark here  since last autumn with very brief sunny intervals. The temperatures were not unusually cold - but the dark days were dispiriting. And so many things did not want to bloom ( even the winter blooming plants in my greenhouse).  There was not enough sunlight.
  Is your life like this sometimes? So many dark, cloudy days with only brief sunny intervals? Mine certainly does. There are things that I wish to accomplish that seem to be taking forever. There are things that I wish would show up in my life that are a long time coming. I keep plugging away in expectation...

I am beginning to feel that I am learning how to wait and see what happens. Especially in situations when I have little no control ( most of them to a degree!). I can always make an effort to control how I respond to these situations. I am certainly capable of making myself more miserable by focusing on the downside. Been there, done that so many times! I am beginning to learn to see what the gift is when what I want is delayed. Sometimes I learn that I want something even better -and it usually arrives in its own good time. Most often I experience a lesson that helps me to grow.
 The dark, cloudy, rainy autumn, winter, and spring has resulted in an astonishing increase in the wildflowers this year. Everything has been late, but the flowering season for so many things has been much longer thanks to the brief sunny intervals which I have learned to really appreciate. I am still cutting small bouquets of rhododendrons!

Here is a Chinese dogwood in my secret garden.This year it is really lovely. It may be my imagination, but the flowers seem larger.

The pink honeysuckle has been a real treat for the hummingbirds (who also arrived late this year!). Maybe the hummingbirds understand patience and timing better than I do.

Last but not at all least, the radicchio Treviso  is 6 ft.tall and loaded with buds just beginning to become a lovely blue accent in the vegetable garden. The long, rainy, cold -but not too frozen- seasons were ideal for it to thrive. From autumn until early spring I had many, many salads from the baby leaves and then many more beautiful red and white striped mature heads which are delicious baked or steamed and then dressed with olive oil and balsamic vinegar. It usually blooms until time to sow next year's crop in August or September. I hope to have a whole summer of its lovely blue flowers.
How about you? Have you had some dispiriting days this year? Have there been any silver linings in the clouds for you yet?
 I would love to see your reflections and comments either here or send me an e-mail : colleen412@gmail.com  if you are shy about commenting here.
 Also please see my Pinterest boards https://www.pinterest.com/colleen2322/
I look forward to your thoughts. Thank you for stopping by!

Dance with Life!

This week I want to expand on embodiment - energy in motion with the intention to be aware of your body and how you feel. It is so healing/healthy to be aware of the state of our body/feeling.
A year or two ago I participated in a soul mapping exercise with Laüra Hollick. One of my compass points is "Appreciate Beauty Everyday"(the name of this blog). Another compass point is "Dance with Life".
 For me dance = music  + movement to the rhythm (not necessarily structured or choreographed). Music + movement are my keys to unlock how I feel in my body. As I dance intentionally I am energy in motion and feeling my e-motion. I notice any tension in my body, how it feels, where I am holding it. Sometimes I can just smile and shake it out.  Physical and/or emotional aches and pains take a bit longer.

I love to dance intentionally in my secret garden.  No one can see me.I feel safe and loved with the bees, butterflies, dragonflies, frogs, the occasional rabbits and deer, and the garden around me. I can safely feel and process feelings that do not feel good (sadness/ anger/disappointment/ distress) and move through them.
Ultimately, we can always choose how we want to feel. The first step is to be fully present to what we are feeling in our bodies right now (not the story in our head!). If it is a feeling that we would like to work through then we can choose our favourite way of expressing it through embodied action. We can dance through our feelings, walk through them, cycle through them, swim through them,etc. So many choices! I want to try the hula hoop and get back to serious roller skating! We can truly change the state of our feeling  by the way we move our bodies (even just changing our facial expression and our posture makes a difference ). If the feeling is very strong it may be a slow process. We may need to take more time and gradually move through the feeling with more than one embodiment session. As I have practiced, I have found it easier to tune in to my body and move through feelings that do not feel good.
What are your reflections? Do you  move through your feelings with a favourite embodiment practice? Have you discovered that it is easier to be in your body most of the time? I am not advocating being totally "out of our heads"- just letting go of the stories we create and rather feeling emotion with our bodies.
Please comment . I love the reflections you are sharing. You can comment here or send me an email  colleen412@gmail.com  or pm me on Facebook. Also you might enjoy some of my Pinterest boards  https://www.pinterest.com/colleen2322/
Thank you for stopping by!

Intention and Embodiment

My quick definition of embodiment is "getting out of the head, moving into the body".  For me, the operative word is "MOVING". Tony Robbins  often uses the phrase "e-motion energy in motion". Embodiment for me is getting in touch with our energy in motion -our emotions- which ultimately end up running our lives no matter how hard we try to reason our way out of them using our heads.  I feel it is possible to move into them, feel them, and choose the ones we want to fuel with our energy.

My favorite mode of energy in motion is taking Dance Breaks. This Snoopy cartoon has been sent to me several times from people who know me- but do not know each other!

I love the lyrics  Taylor Swift sings "I'm just gonna shake it off". Exactly what I do with negative emotions! Besides Dance Breaks -which are for fun and pleasure!- I take Shake Breaks. Shake Breaks can begin with feelings of sadness, disappointment, anger, cravings for potato chips, chocolate cake, ice cream,etc. Results vary, but often I end up laughing at myself in a loving way. At the very least I am fully aware of my feelings and in a short time I can release them if I choose. Shake Breaks have taught me that I do not have to wallow in unhappy feelings (unless I choose to!) And sometimes I  have the chocolate!
I wish I had learned this in gym class instead of all those gruelling exercises  and all of those  competitive sports I hated. I wish I had known then how to "shake it off". I do remember one lovely substitute teacher who taught us some graceful, fluid movements and stretching  which felt good-  like dancing in slow motion.  Hers were the only gym classes I ever enjoyed. I do understand that there are many of us who LOVE competitive sports, running, really challenging weight training, challenging cardio ,etc. I actually did learn how to use my Nordic Track  ( a learning curve for me!). I even enjoy it- only with really fun upbeat rock 'n' roll! (I never miss a beat).
What I FINALLY learned from the Nordic Track was to set an intention to move my body in ways that FEEL GOOD! I have taken ballet (ages 4-14), ballroom dancing (briefly), tap dance (at an advanced age), and swing dance(at an even more advanced age!). Once I got the basic steps I really enjoyed tap and swing- but the lessons were too structured for me. I now enjoy being able to incorporate what I have learned from the lessons into my Dance Breaks.
What I have learned from all this is to set an intention to move my body so that she can make me fully aware of how I am really feeling. Moving my body is not about changing its shape, changing my weight,etc. I move to feel my energy in motion. The result is that I am stronger, and I still have good balance and energy. I have a healthy lean body mass. Without suffering. I no longer even look at blog,videos,etc. that even suggest "no pain, no gain"or "boot camp". (Tracy Campoli  has a fun challenge that is a "booty camp"-  her exercises are challenging, fun, and often based on dance moves.) I love Tiekka Tellier's Everyday Ballet, my mini trampoline(really fun to bounce with Bollywood )music, walking up and down steep hills where I live and gardening (not for the faint of heart in my landscape!).
I understand that there are beautiful athletic women who are amazing, as well as beautiful dancers who are rigorously trained and a joy to see, and women who run , weight train, work out at the gym. I can admire them and honor their path. I have learned to choose just another path. My intention is to inspire women to get their energy in motion on whatever path gets them out of their heads and moving into their bodies.
How do you get your energy in motion? Are you an athlete? Do you workout at a gym? Play competitive sports? Dance? Walk? Swim? Cycle?   I would really appreciate comments here, on Face Book or by email colleen412@gmail.com also on my Pinterest boards https://www.pinterest.com/colleen2322/
Thank you for reading! All comments are welcome.

Embodied Affirmations

This week the sun has returned and I was brave enough to shoot a brief video. It was an adventure- the bees were buzzing around me as they were gathering pollen to make up for all the cold, dark,rainy days we have had this May. I did try to keep calm as they landed in my hair and buzzed in my ears. I decided to be brave and video some Embodied Affirmations. Below I explain the inspirations that nudged me to do this:

I have come a long way since the day my voice teacher had me stand in front of a mirror and say one thing that I thought was beautiful about my body. My lesson time was ticking away... Finally I decided that my eyebrows  were beautiful. Bit by bit over the course of a few years I came to see myself in a different light. It is no surprise that my singing improved  as well!

Some people enjoy affirmations in front of a mirror. I love this video :
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cgw8OFVHzd4  Jessica is adorable! So far, I am not really happy doing mirror work- maybe someday...
Instead I am learning to practice Embodied Affirmations  in the garden or when I am dancing around my kitchen in the morning.  It may have all begun with Meghan Trainor singing "All About That Bass". I love dancing to that song! Engaging my body- especially in dance- makes the affirmations more real for me- I can at least FEEL that they are true -even if my thoughts are not quite there yet.
About 2 weeks ago I saw Christy Whitman's little boy Alex  here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_pP3egqOwRA
He and Jessica are so engaged in their affirmations-   I began to think that I could begin to create my own.
The cherry on the cake was the  video from Tracy Campoli last week
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5GY5EpKVDk
There is an epidemic of self criticism - especially among young women. Each one of them is uniquely beautiful. Perhaps if some of us are brave enough to make Embodied Affirmation videos or post photos of ourselves with affirmations printed on them we can change how we see ourselves and each other.
Do you practice affirmations? Do you enjoy mirror work? Have you done Embodied Affirmations like Jessica's or Alex's or Meghan Trainor's? If not, are you willing to give them a go?
Please leave a comment or make some suggestions about improving my blog. I would also love to share my Pins on Pinterest and see yours! https://www.pinterest.com/colleen2322/

Return of Blackberry Winter

We have been having a long, rainy, chilly spring after a long, dark, sometimes quite cold winter. I am not complaining about the rain, It makes everything so green and lush. Also we have been through long droughts in the past and I much prefer rain! Every year in May when the blackberries bloom here the weather gets cold. I thought we had experienced it the first week of May when it was quite cold.The frost killed  tender new growth on many plants and trees-not to mention the new crop of vegetable seedlings!- This week we are having another round. It's a bit dispiriting.
I cheer myself up by getting out my woolens in spring colors that I have knitted or crocheted just for times like this. I refuse to wear darker winter colors in May! Thank goodness for spring colors in skinny jeans to wear with them.
I also cheer myself by re-reading some of my favorite books or watching favorite movies. This week it was Alice in Wonderland.

I LOVE the classic illustrations!

 I watched this movie on TV re-runs so many times as a child. I finally found a video and the book of the film!

I do love the Tim Burton Version with Alice as a young woman.




And I could not resist the giant mushroom in my garden (thanks to all the rain!) to take this photo.





And this one-Alice having more adventures in my garden...

What do you do to lift your spirits on dark, cold,  rainy days when you are longing for spring sunshine? Please leave a comment or email me. I LOVE being inspired by you!

Be Brave---Only Connect!

 My favourite wild flower Oenothersa speciosa- we called them "pink primroses".

 Miniature wild iris under the boxwood

I wanted to write about a totally different subject this week, but this is what is on my mind.
I live in a very beautiful but fairly remote place in the country with no cell phone service and minimal internet access. As an introvert (INFP on Myers-Briggs) I am perfectly happy in a beautiful house and garden in the country enjoying occasional visits from friends and family. I engage in many creative hobbies. I am never bored.
However, I have felt a tug to connect with other people who share some of my passions- the countryside, animals both domestic and wild, books (I am a former bookseller), flowers (I am now a retired flower farmer and garden designer), music (I have had wonderful voice training and dance lessons), clothing and accessory creation ( I LOVE making my own clothes).
I have joined Google and Yahoo Groups, Facebook groups, followed Pinterest boards and blogs. I enjoy them, but I have not been participating in them as much as I would like.  Until very recently I have been shy about leaving comments and engaging in conversations. I seem to do better when it is a question of posting photos and scans- I was fairly active for several years in some paper doll and doll collecting groups and I love sharing pictures on Pinterest! I have participated in some challenges on Facebook and managed to give my share of encouragement and support. But I have connected with only a few people who have become friends.
Then I saw Barbara Fisher's post about vintage patterns on her blog :
http://marchhousebookscom.blogspot.com/2016/04/sew-in-love-vintage-sewing-patterns.html
What really got my attention was Barbara's wistful sentence about the patterns in the Comments :

"But the dresses, oh the dresses, wish I was 20 – no, 40 years younger, so I could wear them again."

I could not resist  encouraging her to express herself, make  the dresses, and wear them! As a result we have had some lovely, lively exchanges. I have found a friend who shares so many of my interests. And she lives in my favourite part of England! We keep discovering more shared interests, tastes and general outlooks.
 Best  of all, I discovered a strong desire to inspire others  to embody and express themselves by wearing what they love. (Not so surprising  given my love of paper dolls and dolls to dress and photograph in their varied adventures).
I am now inspired to make some videos wearing some of my ancient dresses to encourage others, also to  to share some more of my photos of my dolls' adventures -my favourite way to play!
So I have learned my lesson- when I feel a tug to comment and encourage someone I am going to go ahead. There are no doubt many more wonderful friends out there for me.
Have you ever been rewarded by being brave on social media? 
Have you ever found a wonderful new friend unexpectedly?
Please leave a comment below or email me colleen412@gmail.com
Visit my Pinterest  boards  https://www.pinterest.com/colleen2322/

Appreciation in times of doubt and uncertainty

Another blog prompt from Stacey Hoffer Weckstein at Wisdom Bloggers Sisterhood!
No matter how fabulous our lives can be we experience times of doubt , uncertainty, even fear that we are on the wrong track! How to respond?
The first thing I do is check in with how my body feels. Usually I have a sinking feeling in my sacral space ( the area just below the navel). I make an effort to just stay with the feeling and not attach a "story"to it (this takes practice!). Just stay with the feeling and breathe.
 Then I ask myself  when did I first feel this feeling? Usually something has happened when I have given my power away and allowed someone else to affect my sense of well being or I have tried to control something I have no control over.
What is the feeling? Anxiety, dread,  sadness....? Of course, there are times when I have eaten something that disagrees with me or I need to eat , or I need a dance break or a nap!  Really being present to my body gives me clarity about  my discomfort and the source of it. No stories- just the feeling!
Once I have clarity about what I am feeling ,  I can ask my body to tell me what would feel better. I know this sounds crazy if you are not in the habit of dialoging with your body! After some practice, though, it is amazing how clear the answers are . Not only are they clear,  if I implement them I feel better fast!
So today I had some anxiety about a discussion with a family member. The discussion resulted in my giving my power away and feeling a sense of abandonment (I had abandoned myself!). I was also overdue for breakfast... My body wanted to be fed and to have a sense of well-being and a warm hug.
Here is where the Appreciation comes in! I begin to make a delicious breakfast - being thankful for all the lovely ingredients at my disposal. Also I arranged my Italian painted tray with a lovely place setting and the food beautifully arranged.  I took my tray out to my secret garden and sat on the edge of the water lily pool in the warm sunshine. There is nothing like warm sunshine enveloping my body to give me a sense of well-being and a warm hug! The extra surprise to send my feeling of well-being soaring was an adorable frog who sat next to me on the edge of the pool and an aerial dance by many beautiful blue dragonflies to entertain me as I enjoyed my breakfast.
As if that were not enough to appreciate, as I basked in the sunshine replete with my delicious (and rather large!) breakfast several of the blue dragonflies began to land in my hair and on my hands! They played with me for quite sometime. I enjoyed admiring how wonderfully made they are as well as how beautiful and blue!

 Hard to photograph - they move so quickly and I have not mastered taking a photo with only one hand when they rest on my hand or arm!
Do you agree that you have the power to feel better in times of doubt, uncertainty, even fear?  Do you have favorite practices to feel better that involve appreciation for what is good right now in the moment ? Have you had surprises like dragonflies dancing for you in the air when you become present in the moment appreciating what is good right now?
 I would love to share more thoughts on this topic. Please leave a comment below or on Facebook!

Appreciate Beauty Birthday

This week I am celebrating and reflecting. Another birthday....
I have learned some mantras from various teachers that i am using as a basis for my reflections. They are-
 1) Love What Is Now- appreciate what is happening in the moment- it is a blessing or a lesson. Be present to and love every moment of my life . I am responsible for how I deal with what is happening. Love without asking for love to be returned.
2) Shine Your Light- we all have a unique light to shine on the world around us, if we dim our light the world is a bit darker.
3) Appreciate Beauty (including your own!)
4) Dance with Life! - my favorite and sometimes the most difficult to practice.
All 4 create plenty of opportunity for growth!
Here are some photos of my misty , rainy landscape on my birthday:

 New Pink Door!

Lilacs!

 Lady Banks rose!

Copper Beech and woodland flowers

I hope you have as much beauty to appreciate everyday1 Please leave a comment. I love hearing what you all think!

What Does It Mean To Love More Fully ?

This week's prompt from Wisdom Bloggers Sisterhood led by Stacey Hoffer Weckstein is a challenge. Especially since my birthday is this week and it's time to reflect and assess my growth.
First what does it mean to love? Over the years I  have begun to learn that to love is a practice requiring acceptance. First accepting ourselves as we are right now - not the person we want / hope / or are working on to be. These can be a big stumbling block for many of us- giving ourselves permission to be authentic- loving and valuing ourselves just as we are with our strengths, weaknesses and imperfections. When we can love ourselves exactly as we are we can begin to love ourselves more fully. This does take practice!!
How do we do this? I have had to grow into giving up being what Amy Pearson calls an "Approval Addict". It has been quite a process learning to approve of myself and not to need the approval of others. I am prone to be what Amy Pearson calls  a "Hero Worshipper" (seeking approval from people I admire and hope that they will like me) and a "Performer"/ "Perfectionist" ( striving to be entertaining, talented, etc to impress the Heroes!)
I have also had to learn to stand in my own power and not allow myself  to depend on anyone else to make me feel good, happy, etc. Also not to give anyone power to make me feel sad, unlovable, etc. This has been and continues to be a real growing experience! I am responsible for my feelings and for how my life unfolds. It is a scary as well as liberating process!
I have had to learn how to feel my feelings without attaching a "story" to them- if I begin a story, I use Byron Katie's The Work to discover if what I am telling myself is really true. ( It almost always  is NOT.) I have also learned many things that soothe me,  light me up, and raise my energy.
All of these growing experiences are teaching me how to accept and love others as well as myself. For me to love more fully is to continue to accept myself as I am now (while continuing to GROW into the best "me " I can be) and to continue to learn to accept others as they are now ( whether they grow or not- that is their choice).
This is not to say that we cannot limit our contact with people who drain our energy, who are not kind, etc.  We can, however accept them as they are choosing to be, send them love, wish them well and keep our encounters with them to a minimum. We cannot change them- we can only choose how much we interact with them. Many of us have family members in this category!
I would love to know what you think it means to love more fully! How do you do it?  Am I on the right track?
Please leave a comment below.